The mental load

This mental load though….

It’s bigger than my f*cking washing pile.

At one point i was JUST about managing.
Just. Very nearly.

And then came the Christmas play. And the spelling test.and odd sock day. And send £3 for a calendar. And don’t forget upcoming birthday presents. What about RSVPing.. You MUST do that!
Did you forget Christmas jumper day!?
Are the school uniforms clean?
Did i change the washing over?
Dont forget your covering an extra shift!
What about the childcare have you thought about that?
Did anyone sign oscars homework book?
Need to call the dieticians.
And the dentist. Shit!

And thats when Thursday evening hit me like the sack of shit it is. My partners doing overtime tomorrow, i forgot…no idea how or why i would forget i mean….. I have nothing else to remember. But subsequently my 8am start at work clashes heavily with my now, school run.

So i call my mom.. Because thats what we do when things get tough and… I’ve already called on her for numerous things this week and she said “is your head just full of air at the moment or what?”

And i said “no its just i have SO much to remember and WHY IS IT MY JOB TO SORT CHILDCARE WHEN THERES OVERTIME?! “

and that my friends is the straw that broke the already crawling, through thick mud, donkeys back.


A night off from being mom and dad.

You kinda lose it don’t you? As much as you both don’t wanna admit it.. As much as your family is everything you longed for.

The family days out are amazing and you’d never want to give up this life but…. You do miss the fun or a spontaneous date,
Not worrying about a little person walking in on you getting frisky,
How energised and great your body felt pre – family life..
Pulling different kind of all nighters.

Now there’s swimming lessons and packed lunches and getting the last minute school uniform done..
Night feeds and bickering about who’s more tired.

You wouldn’t change it.
But i think it’s massively important that to keep the spark, you need to find yourselves again.
Get a babysitter. Have a wild night. Get blind drunk and pretend you’re on a dodgy video… (you know)
Hold hands and be the couple you were when you first started dating,
You’re better parents when you’re a solid, happy couple
And although you will lose it, you definitely gotta find it again. ♥️

I’ve published a book…

So I wrote and illustrated my own book and I can’t believe I’ve actually done it. ALL ABOUT PREGNANCY an area of expertise for me I feel,purely based on my own experiences anyway haha.

It took me a gazillion errors,a lot of stress and all sorts to work out exactly how to format the book and send it to be printed.I sent it to publishers and agents full of hope.

I’m still waiting on many replies from them but my spontaneity couldn’t wait much longer so I launched it as a self published book instead.Don’t get me wrong,I won’t make much,in fact…I’ll likely only make pennies but I still feel so proud.It’s been exciting finding packaging and stickers and getting it just perfect for that final push.

My first day got 19 sales and I’m sure most of those are pity but damn…I’ll take them,I’m excited for what’s next. Though i don’t think I’ll be Waterstones best author illustrator just yet haha.

If you’re interested in buying my book CLICK HERE Thankyou for all your support as always

An open letter to my partner…

Dear partners,

In advanced warning – no we’re NOT in the mood.

YES we are f**king fed up.

YES You should order takeaway again (and dont you dare emphasise the AGAIN or mention our slimming world membership )

And ABSOLUTELY YES get another bottle out.

this won’t be forever, we don’t REALLY hate you, or the children. But we are struggling right now.
We know you are too.
We’re doing our best soldiering through.

Love us,
The tired, workingfromhome,homeschooling parents.